New Stakes

I had the chance to go to the Conference Center tonight for a meeting about the new YSA stakes that are being formed.  I am excited for the change.  I think it will be a good thing for boundaries to be enforced and for University wards to be dissolved. I am not sure how I feel about being in a bigger ward, but I am looking forward to the possibilities.

At the meeting I realized a few things.  The first is that I am officially released from my calling.  Part of me is glad because the past few weeks I haven't felt a part of the presidency.  We rarely met which made it hard for me to know exactly how and who to serve.  At the same time I am sad because I have really loved being a part of the Relief Society in this way.  I never had a testimony of Relief Society until this ward and I don't want to loose that.

The second thing I thought was, this is it.  I have one more year before I graduate from the YSA program.  Once you turn 31 it seems as if the Church gives up all hope in you.  I never even thought that I would face graduating from the Singles Ward, but deadline is not far off.  One more year and then where do I fit as a member?

The last thing I thought of is based on something Elder Ballard said about letting go of fear of the future and walking in faith.  I realize I am afraid, not of what will happen around me but that I won't be able to contribute or that I won't ever move from this stage of life.  Elder Ballard also said we need to lower our standards and stop looking for perfection because it's not there.  It was so nice to hear these things because that is what media says we should be doing.  It is like a movie being played over and over again in my head, you must have a man like Horatio Hornblower to be happy, which isn't the case.  I need to find someone who will help me grow towards the perfection we all seek and someone who will let me help him.

Anyways, I suppose only time will tell what life brings.  In the mean time I am excited for the changes and can't wait to meet my new Ward.